Today I attended the funeral of my cousin. Very sweet service - with funny stories that had all of us laughing and nodding our heads in complete understanding, along with tears in our eyes.
The pastor mentioned my cousin had lived 7 decades - as in many services there was a slide show playing of pictures, her children had pictures of her all through out the chapel. My cousin had a hard life, she faced many adversities and valley's. But in all those pictures she had a smile so bright, down right laughter shining from her eyes. She loved rings - and would wear one on every finger. You knew where she stood - she made no bones about it.
Of course as in all funerals I left reflecting. And I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I don't have pictures of myself smiling with eyes shining. For 12 years I was a single mom working two or three jobs - I missed so much. What if my kids are adversely affected? What memories will they have of that time. And now taking care of mom - I don't have a lot of time to be wife and mom in the way I want to me - I know this is a season but what am I missing, and are Steve and the kids missing anything? What will their memories of me be?
Decades - I don't need to look at decades - I need to look at days..hours - how am I spending my days? How will my kids remember me? Am I making an impact in their lives? Am I working to expand God's kingdom? Does my testimony bear a positive witness?
My cousin was saved at an older age - and a relative read a letter she wrote to him - giving him scripture and how it touched her and what she learned from it. Challenging him to apply these same scriptures in his own life.
1 comment:
Becky, I can honestly say that I think you and you children will look back at these days with a sweetness rather than a bitterness. It's hard to explain, but I think it's a lot like what the author tries to tell us with the Footprints poem if we just think about it. Every family's life has some difficulty and lots of unkindness and worry. It will help them when they are on their on to see that family life has its ups and downs and the downs are really what builds and strengthens those bonds.
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