Saturday, August 20, 2016

Caregiver in the final stages

It is Saturday. I am so lonely and so sad. Caregiving in the final stages is different. The cues on what is needed and wanted by mom are harder to read. To understand. 

I can remember those long days and nights at the beginning when I prayed she would just sit down for five minutes. When it seemed the medicine prescribed to calm her took forever to work. Now 1/4 th of that same medicine will knock her out for 24 hours. Her appetite is great. No problems swallowing. Mom will call me by name sometimes. 

She is bed ridden. I did hold her up and she took three steps the other night. Remembering one foot in front of the other.  I remembered when those skinny legs moved with her dust mop. 

I don't know if this is the source of my sadness. I have a feeling my caregiving will end as empty nesting officially begins. What will I do? My marriage is not that great. I'm tossing around a second job and online classes.  

If you want to know what my tonight looks like and what my tomorrow will be here are a couple of pics.  Please pray.


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