Sunday, March 30, 2014

Sweet words

In the midst of our hellish day yesterday - mom said "thank you for all you do for me.  love you."

That was a gift!

Clean Up Complete

I just finished cleaning carpets with Sam's help - and technically we are not finished - he is going to finish for me tomorrow after school. And that is the room with the biggest need - mom's room.  We just can't do a whole lot when she is awake.  I have cleaned and cleaned all weekend. Laundry basket after laundry basket.  But I can tell you this - house looks and smells better.  To be hones, Tori's room was the worst.  But the germaphobic in me feels much better.  :)

I didn't rush - just did what I could when I could - my bed was the pile up point for laundry - but it is folded and put up.  

We just snacked all weekend - except for last night - Steve and I went out to a local restaurant - I needed the break.  Today - I ran to dollar store and grocery store - and stopped by Sonic for my therapy drink. 

Today, Mom is 84.  My sister Pam and niece Jennifer came by for a visit - mom was alert - and stayed calm all day - played with her babies.

Over all the weekend was okay - not going to lie - Saturday was hard - but a good nights sleep on Friday helped with that.  And today with mom behaving - was good.

Saturday, March 29, 2014

Mount St. Martha Erupts

Today at approximately 10:15 am - Mount St. Martha erupted. 
Warning...not for weak stomachs.......

Two years ago I could not have handled.  Today it didn't faze me.

We had the great poopie explosion - after a few days of constipation - or let me put it this way - a few days of not wanting to sit long enough to go potty - and then trouble builds up.

After two cocktails of Milk of Magnesia and prune juice  - and I surely thought one would have been enough - it happened.

And it happened in a big way - it would have been easier to clean her up and such - had she cooperated - but she was not in the mood for cooperating - she broke a hall table fighting me on the way to bathroom - leaving a trail of poopie along the way.  Ugh - tomorrow I am going to rent an industrial cleaner.  I scrubbed all I could with vinegar, gain and Odo-ban. 

Took me an hour to get her cleaned up , dressed and settled to eat breakfast - I have literally been washing, scrubbing all day.  I just hung up shower curtain (yes that bad).

Again, if she had just followed me instead of fighting me and such - I would have no trail - I could have just put her in the tub - and it would have been a piece of cake - but nope. 

Sam sat with her so I could cleaned up  - and bless his heart "Momma, I don't know how you do it."  And I honestly said "I don't either" - (I was questioning my sanity at that moment)

Steve and I priced linoleum flooring - we will put in her room, hallway and Tori's room  - a temporary low cost solution - but I think necessary - I think it will be feasible in about a month or two - it is at the point it is a necessity - I can't take it much longer and it will be so much easier to clean. Fortunately, Steve's brother - does awesome work - so we will have help - what we saw tonight at Lowes - has a wood floor look and my guesstimate was material would cost about $450.00,  But it will look better than this horrible carpet.

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

No longer...,

Today a friend lost her mother. She is no longer a caregiver. Her mother is in heaven...healed and whole. 

I often wonder as my friend has and probably is...what do you do when you don't have to outline every second of your day? How long will it take for the emotional, spiritual, mental and physical exhaustion to go away? Or does it?

This little lady....

I love her so. She is my ministry. Right now like any involved in ministry I'm tired and discouraged. Tomorrow is a new day. Blessed for new beginnings! 

Pray for my friend Karen. And for my friend Diane's family...her uncle passed away last night. 


I had the hardest time getting out of bed this morning.  I do every morning.  It would help I suppose not to lay down for an hour after Steve and Sam leave in the morning - I should hop in the shower and get moving.  But noooooooooooooo I lay down.

I am at work trying to get motivated so I can motivate!

Tuesday, March 18, 2014


Suicide, cancer, Alzheimer's.......why?

A friend lost a family member to suicide.  I keep up with three blogs-children suffering -  plus what my nephew went through - cancer.  Alzheimer's I could write all day. 

I know we live in a fallen world.  I know we as believers, children of God, will know no pain and will have complete healing.....

But I hate to see people hurting.  Suffering.  My heart breaks.

Sunday, March 16, 2014


Fighting discouragement in a big way.  Need much prayer.


We ate catfish here....Braden Station.   They have an all you can eat buffet - it is really good.  However - it pays for Steve to eat Buffet -but not me.  I could just order off the menu.  Sam watched mom for us.  It had been awhile since we ate there - they are only open two nights a week.  But it has eclectic decorations and a nice, comfortable, family atmosphere.

Saturday, March 15, 2014


Spring is agreeing with mom - or is it vice versa?  Mom had literally stopped her daily, hourly cleaning and dusting - now she is back at it.  Unreal.  She seems stronger physically also.

And since I have written this before, since the Alzheimer's has progressed - mom has potty issues - constipation is horrible for an Alzheimer's patient - as is an UTI.  But for some reason - GOD! - She has been pretty regular and has not needed any type of medicine.  Yay!  You can tell she feels better. 

She will sit in my desk chair and turn it toward the back door and watch outside - we try to get her go outside - but she doesn't want to - but just the sunshine in, does wonders.

Friday, March 14, 2014

Three Days....randomness.

I have been off the past three days - sick.  The doctor said I am tired and stressed. 

A lot of female stuff going on - ugh!  I

I have rested well yesterday and today - I have slept a lot - and right now I am so tired.  My jaw where mom hit me a couple of weeks ago with her hair brush is really hurting.  I still ache all over and such - I am going to schedule a check up with my regular doctor.  I don't mean to sound whiny - but I can't take care of mom - or even function at work and here at home if I feel as yuck as I do.
I have checked emails from home - and handled some issues - and Sunday before I go in - I will review all of them. 

Next weekend Steve and I are going to Nashville for a break away - we are leaving Friday after work.  Melecia will be staying with mom.  I have been looking online on things to do  (like we have never been before)but I am interested in the Opry and the General Jackson Cruise.  I have been looking for coupon codes and such.  Hotel is booked - I used every discount I could think of. 

Today is  our Anniversary - 6 years.  Boy we have lived a life time in these six years. Both hurting from divorces - learning how to be married again.  Losing half our income in less than a year - mom getting sick - his dad  having heart surgery - one son in trouble - just life!

Tori and Sam are doing great.  I am so proud of them - they have a generous heart and giving spirit.

Took mom yesterday afternoon for a haircut - and that was an adventure.  Followed by a BBQ.  Then Dollar General - I have to remind her to pick up her feet - I am constantly saying Left, left, left right left.  We have a rhythm going.  She is playing more and more with her baby dolls.  And loves folding their blankets.   I don't understand Alzheimer's - it is a learn as you go experience - I don't care how many books are written - every case is different.

So many prayer requests...

Pray for my nephew Rusty - yet to find a job - but had an interview today that seems promising.

A member of our church gave birth to her baby two months prematurely - and the sweet little boy has developed pneumonia. 

Memphis is still covered up in crime.  Kids are getting shot - little ones - it is heart breaking.

Tori has a friend -she and her husband were 4 or 5 months into pregnancy - the baby has died.  I cannot imagine.  They had images the new modern kind - so they have that strong connection.

My sister Judy and her husband Charlie - they are being hit from every direction - and I wish I could do more - praying God sends a miracle - only He can provide.

My friend Karen - her mom is in the hospital -and is not doing that great.  So much happened to her mind and body.  They are making the tough decision to swap out types of feeding tubes so she can be moved to a rehab facility.  She can nod her head, but not move her feet and arms.

Pray for that missing plane!  Pray for our leadership.  Pray for pastors. 

Thank you for praying for me and my little family!


Tuesday, March 11, 2014


Tired. Drained. Back to not sleeping.

I am battling negative thoughts and hurt feelings. I wish I could put these swirling emotions into words.

Steve has been a rock these past few days. The time change has been very hard on mom and us!  So grateful for his strength.

We are going to take a weekend  on the 21st. More like a rest  .no specific plans. Melecia  is taking the extra hours to help pay fur medical bills.  This is one of those trips we can't afford but can't afford not to. Does that make sense? I got a good deal on a hotel using promo codes and coupons. This one was my idea...I need  the break.

Friday, March 07, 2014


Rusty has a couple of job interviews.....pray the right job comes along.

Pray we have a good weekend! I need mom to behave, not fall, walk strong, and be able to get out just a little bit - it is supposed to be 65 tomorrow - so I am thinking it is doable.

Work has been busy - I see our peak season coming in. 

I have been exercising - I am losing inches -not lbs.  Hmmmm..  But I do feel better - I would feel better if the numbers on the scale went down.  I found this one work out 10 minutes long - concentrating on legs and behind - it is some tough stuff. Girls and I did it here at work -and they are believers.  It feels like 30 minutes. With the exercising - I sleep better.

I am so blessed - God continues to provide and protect. 

Tori travels this weekend with her Criminal Justice Group to Kansas City, MO to compete  - she is ready.  They will also be meeting with FBI and other recruiting agencies. She loves it.  So proud. 

Sam cleaned out our garage, off our patio and his room  yesterday (under duress) but it looks much better. 

Continue to pray for Steve's safety - every area that he works in, there is a shooting every day.  Whew.  Memphis - young men not raised the way they should be.  Pray for Memphis.

Pray for the Ukraine!

Thursday, March 06, 2014

A set back...

Rusty did not start work. Monday the weather kept him home and they ok'd it. His truck broke down yesterday and ride did not show. Employer told him via unprofessional text he wasn't needed! Hmmph!

Pray he finds something soon.

She's back!

Melecia made it back after her mom's surgery. Ms. Betty broke her back. She is slowly recovering. Please pray for her and the family. It was like they rushed her out way too soon. And Obama care showed first she was denied surgery due to age. Doctors and family had to fight for it!

Here is a pic of Melecia and mom. She is giving mom a manicure. All of is were excited to see her!

We were hit hard. Nearly 50 degree drop in temperature on Sunday, add rain, sleet, thunder, lightening, you experienced every season. All said and done we ended up with six inches of ICE!

Our home from the street..

I worked from home Monday and Tuesday. I was about to go nuts / had pretty much been in the house since Friday.  Went in today. Side roads were horrible...once I made it to highway it was fine.

While outside I fell backwards hard on the ice..please pray my neck is killing me. I feel yuck!

Blessed we stayed warm and safe!

Sunday, March 02, 2014


My nephew returns to work tomorrow.  Praise the Lord.  Diagnosed with Stage 3 testicular cancer in September - 100% cancer free today - God is so good.  So many prayers answered. 

My friend Nancy - had reconstruction surgery this past week.  She is doing well.

I have been reading and watching a lot on Alzheimer's, trying to learn something new - to see if there is anything I can do.  Patience is key....something I seem to be short on here lately.  Mom seems to be more combative each day - and I truly thought we would be going other way by now.  I keep telling myself it is the disease and not mom.  My reaction is key.  My dad, his sister and two of mom's sisters had this hateful disease.  She has lived longer than any from diagnosis - has to be quality care.  And God - all God - not me.  But I am discouraged.  I am tired.  Yesterday - I was cleaning mom up - and I forgot her shirt - so I left her alone in bathroom for 1 minute - a minute long enough for her to pick up a hairbrush and hit me across face twice - I think something cracked.  I am in pain - have no clue what to do.  The pain is intense. 

Today she has been sweet - - just a busy bee.  Good grief.  Into everything.  She has played with her babies, ate well, changed clothes, and took medicine - with no fuss.  Now, she is snoring in her bed - blankets up to her chin.

I would be lying if I didn't say I am battling resentment and anger - I put a post on Facebook asking for help - to help cover Melecia being out (The agency had no one) No family answered. But two friends did - so the gap was covered.  I had to pay - but I just knew I had to be at work. And I was right. Pray that the agency is able to find those interested in being subs - who may want to work part - time.  They find folks -but they are not passing back ground checks.  I am sure it is very frustrating for them.

I had two breaks this weekend -what a blessing!  Tori treated me to lunch and afterwards she suffered through grocery shopping.  And today, before it got real bad - I went to Sonic for my therapy drink.  Both helped considerably.  Steve's oldest came out for a visit yesterday.  It was nice to see him - please pray for him - no details - just pray.

I have washed so much laundry the past two days.  Melecia has me spoiled - while she was out with her mom - things I am so used to her doing - I had to do.  I so appreciate her.  Her mother, Betty, had trouble waking up from the anesthesia, but seems to be coming around.  She has remembered she broke her back.  She is staying with Melecia's sister.  Please pray for her continued recovery.  And for Melecia's sister - so many health issues of her own.

The kids are fine - Tori is home tonight - I am glad - she is snuggled in her room. Sam in his. 

The weather is all whacked out - 65 degrees yesterday and this morning.  Now we are getting thunder and an Ice Storm - unreal.  State of Emergency for Shelby County has been issued, schools have been closed.  We have power - but the town of Brighton does not.  This area has seen much damage from falling limbs and such.

Thank you for allowing me to vent - I am blessed to have true friends.