Friday, November 30, 2012


Diane and I were talking tonight...and this came up.

How do the folks passing out samples decide who they want to ask? This is bothering me.

For instance I was walking through Dillard's (and no I can't afford them but that's beside the point) and the cologne girl never offered me a sample sniff or whatever. Same day shopping..I was walking through the mall and a vacuum salesman stopped me.


Being a wife....

I listen and see other women who seem to be so much better at it than I. I don't think it is comparing...more like seeing where I need to improve.

I'm not very patient. And here lately I'm exhausted to the point of collapsing. I rather rest at home than go out. Though last week I enjoyed a night out with Steve.

I need to allow God to work through me. I need to pray for my marriage and my husband.

No longer a teen....Happy Birthday Tori!

December 1, 1992. A tiny little girl was born. Victoria Ann Mills. Tori.

Tori, every birthday is precious. A gift. But you are turning 20. No longer a teenager. To me this is a huge milestone birthday. My baby girl is growing up. Has grown up.

You were little, but did everything early. Born with spunk and tons of confidence. Never afraid to try anything new. And that hasn't changed.

I pray for you. I pray for the choices and the decisions you make. I pray you will grow a discerning spirit. I want you to know how valuable - how important you are. I want you to know your kisses are valuable. God has someone for you. Don't rush! Wait!

To me you are that little blonde girl who would sit on top of the cabinet and help me make "fluffins" (muffins) and pick out the chocolate chips from the batter. Your little husky voice reading with me Ten Apples on Top and Go Dog Go. Now you show no interest in cooking and you go to college.

I remember when you asked Jesus into your life. We were sitting in the couch in our little rental house and I had the privilege of being the one you talked to and asked questions.

Oh, how we've fussed. And we will still disagree on things...ok a lot of things. But you always have loved your momma. Going to work with me. In tough times, me you and Sam talking through the night. You help me with mema.

You are very matter of fact and blunt. There is no secret on where you stand. There are times I wonder how in the world you make it through the day...then I stand in awe of accomplishments. You are not afraid of hard work.

I encourage you to be kind. To love all. To forgive. To value family and friends.

I encourage you to cling to God. He loves you more than I do. Pray before decisions.
Cherish The Cross and what it stands for.

I am so proud of you. I love you so much.
You will always be my baby girl. Happy Happy 20th birthday.

No sleep

None. Zip!

Mom either.

I'm so tired and whiny.


Awake as usual!

Last night was sandwich night...I sill don't get it. Why did I have so much clean up?

I rewrapped the gifts Barney chewed open plus a couple more. I ordered mom Pete the repeat is so darn cute and funny. Barney hates it. Ha! Kylee is indifferent.

We have a few dinners planned during the month. As I mentioned before with mom we can't go a lot of places so we have decided to host here. I can't wait. Keeping it all simple. My sister Judy has asked that we help with take shoebox ministry for local mission . That has me excited. We all are a paycheck or illness away. The needs and the wants are simple and humbling.

My baby girl will be 20 Saturday. I will write more later for her. It is just hard to believe. She had to work late I'm waiting for her to get home.

Diane, thinking of you.

Thursday, November 29, 2012


Trying to explain to mom that she doesn't need to sleep in her shoes.

Here is our conversation from five minutes ago.

Me: "Mom take your shoes off. And let's go to sleep."

Mom: "I don't want to sleep in my shoes. Who sleeps in their shoes. You sleep in sleepers." (pajamas and while saying this she is fully dressed sweater, purse and all..but I dare not go there)

Me: "ok, let's take your shoes off."

Mom: "well no, I want to leave them on."

Not gonna push it. She is very wild eyed. We have house quiet and dark. Sleep is looking tough.

And you know what the trigger probably is? And I'm sorry to get personal. She probably has to go to bathroom. Read about it. Constipation, fever and uninary Tract infections will mess up an Alzheimer patient in a hurry. The Phillips MOM
Should work. I pray so.

I'm tired. I hope I sleep.


I've said it before....

And I will say it again....

I hate Alzheimer's.

I wish I could adequately describe how mom is tonight.

She doesn't know me. But knows Steve.

Customer Service

I'm one tired customer service representative.

Tons of phone calls. I would hang up from one and it would ring again. Same for my coworker Kathy. Add emails, faxes, live chat, it was relentless. People get so mad over the most silly things.

We've been yelled at, cussed at, you name it. We never lost our patience on the phone, but I had to step outside a time or two. If I hadn't, I would have been on the news. Ha ha!

Tonight is sandwich night. No cooking.

Mom is very confused tonight. I don't know where she is in her mind.

Pray for a good night.

Sam, Barney and Kylee

 Barney - do not let this cute face fool you - he is a mess!  But we love him.
Kylee - Barney's mom and my baby. 

Sam and Kylee

Sam and Barney


I woke up thinking it was Saturday. Obviously it is not.


Wednesday, November 28, 2012


Please please join me in prayer. Please pray for my friend Debbie and her husband. He has been diagnosed with kidney cancer..he has other spots they will know more tomorrow.

9:00 am

Mom slept to 9:00 am today. Why doesn't she do that on Saturday?


The guy staying in moms house has it all wrong!

The coffee pot does not go there! Move it to the other side!

And no no no! What are you doing with the microwave? The breadbox goes there!

We won't even discuss the recliner. Just too stressful. I bet I can check the closets and the clothes are not color coordinated.


Ha ha!

The last few boxes.....

Right after work I went to moms house and brought home the last few boxes of her stuff. I did see a couple of other things in attic I need to get. And those are mine.

But what I brought home tonight was all mom. Christmas decorations. She had thinned them out years ago. She was not the sentimental type. (Unlike me...I have a story behind a lot of ornaments or they are dated with the kids names on them with the idea once they marry I will pass them on. And for me not to be a pack rat I'm hard pressed to throw anything Christmas out...I may need that 1 inch piece of greenery! Ha!)

Back to mom's stuff. Sam wanted her little 2 ft tree for his room. And I wanted this snow globe we were never allowed to touch. My dad didn't understand the rule either. He said it didn't make sense to have a musical snow globe if you are not allowed to shake it or wind it up. I took great pleasure in turning it upside down and back again. Ha ha. I will post a picture of it later. It was always a favorite of moms. In the boxes came her snowman collection...I put out a few left the rest packed. And her collection of cheesy yet cute stuffed snowmen and Santas. She loves dolls and toys now, so I have them out for her. She will see them in the morning. I bet she moves them.

I forgot until right now that along with the decorations I brought home two boxes that held baby quilts and blankets that belonged to Tori and Sam. Oh, how I remember so clearly laying them on those quilts for pictures, play and cuddling. I'm washing them.

Boxes can bring good memories.


Sam and I had a good time at the football banquet last night.  Steve stayed home with mom.

He really does love and respect his coach.  He has learned so much from Coach Larry.

Here are some pics....

Listening to his Coach intently......
 Receiving his certificate
 8th grade players - they all love Coach Larry
Listening and watching Coach receive his gift the team gave him

2:14 am

Wide awake!


Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Am I being narrow minded?

I really and truly do not want another book on Alzheimer care giving. I have read so much plus I have a couple of web-sites I read daily.

Am I being narrow minded and ungrateful?

Can I be honest? I would love to have the time and the energy to read a non-thinking piece of fluff. But the minute I get still I collapse.

My day begins at 5 pretty much. If Im not physically out of bed my mind is turning and I usually need to coax mom back to bed at some point because I am not ready to walk into Alzheimer land. But I can promise you I wake up at 2:00 am every day and stay awake until 3:30 or so.

I guess I sound pitiful and selfish.

Tickled mom

Mom and I visited my sister Judy.  She kept poking and tickling Judy - Judy decided mom needed a dose of her medicine. 

Mom laughed so hard - she had tears in her eyes.  It was so good to see her really laugh.

Barney opened two presents

Tori left the dogs in on Sunday...

This is what we came home and found....two presents opened...paper to shreds.   I guess he couldn't wait.  No gifts destroyed. Whew!

Decorated for Christmas....

The Friday after Thanksgiving is our day to decorate. With mom took me much longer.  She only wanted to hang two ornaments up that we bought at Dollar General - then she was through. (almost sounds like a kid) Then she wanted a snack. 

The Living Room

The Nativity in our entry way.

My Santa Claus Collection - on the bookshelf full of kids books. 

 China Cabinet in kitchen- I emptied it - and Inside went my Christmas Village! 

Steve's tree - this tree is from his days as single fellow.  He wanted it up - so it is in a corner in our kitchen. The potholders and things hanging - some are hand made by an Aunt.

Lawsuit on Bank Fees

I was part of a law suit on bank fees...I received this HUGE check.  ha ha ha.

Sam at the "kiddie" table.

He looks so big....we laughed and laughed!

Mopping Mom

Mom mopping on Thanksgiving...she mopped so hard - she had to come out of the sweater.

Ha ha.

One thing to check off my to do list....sorta

Sam, in order to remove something from my to do list (his words)....signed us up for the football banquet. I told him fine. And then asked him when is it? ( this happened this morning ummmm five minutes before he caught the bus.)


"What day I ask?"



Going to Work...

Mom thinks she is going to work.

Oh boy!

She has been knocking on doors all morning.

I will be going into work. I feel better than yesterday..a tad washed out...but better. Except for the multiple cold sores on and outside my mouth. I didn't feel then coming!

Have a good day.

Monday, November 26, 2012

Tough and other stuff...

Still feeling tough. My stomach is rolling.

Thankfully mom has gone to bed early and the rest of the house seems to be settling.

Tori will be 20 this week. Is it wrong for us to give her a curfew? Of course it is not. We've said 2:00. You'd think we were asking her to walk over hot coals. We are stressing the safety of a young girl being out. I know she is not doing anything bad..just hanging out with friends. I have said it is a matter of respect. On top of safety! I'm sticking to it. My mom alarm wakes me up every night! Hmmph!

Listening and watching Melecia today with mom was awesome. She is so good. I'm sure she doesn't get paid enough. She never complains, is so professional yet loving.

I've yet to decorate outside. I keep it pretty simple.

Have a good night.

Thanks for praying.


Pray for the family of a Munford High School teacher. She passed away yesterday behind the school .. She fed the stray cats. It appears to be natural causes, but I do not know details.

Please pray for the students and the teachers of Munford High School.


I am home sick today. Stomach virus. This probably explains why I felt so tough yesterday. Ever wise Melecia (I called her to give her a heads up on condition of household) seems to think it is exhaustion.
She is probably right. Germaphobic me has tried to wipe and disinfect....but my energy is slipping.

Mom seems to be okay. Sluggish. But it is early yet. Ha ha. Alzheimer's has a way of perking the patient and the caregiver up in a hurry.

Pray for a speedy recovery. Really couldn't afford to miss work today.

Sunday, November 25, 2012

Self Diagnosis

Is not a good thing.

I'm sure the majority of what is wrong with me is from stress. But I hurt all over. I ache. Every joint. Every muscle. I am so tired. I don't have the least bit of energy. Going to the grocery store zapped the last of my strength and energy. Though I did make Tacos tonight...everyone loved them. Seemed to hit the right spot.

I have looked up depression, chronic fatigue, fibromyalgia and more. But I seem to fall under these three. I know I'm not a doctor and I need a good check up. I need something. Just don't know what that something is.

Mom has gone to bed. I will post a funny story along with pictures tomorrow. I'm telling you...I live in the middle of my own reality TV show.

Before grocery shopping we visited with my sister. Mom enjoyed it.

Hopefully I rest.

Good night.

Something new...

It could turn around.,.

Today mom could not put her clothes and shoes on. Didn't understand socks.

It could just be a moment. Or we could be going further down the path. I'm praying that it is a moment.

Night of not sleeping

No sleep! Well, I woke up at my usual 2:00am and have not slept. Mom is still I'm going to try to snooze for a bit.

I feel terrible.


Saturday I was ready to give out, give up and go away. I feel that way right now.

I was burned out. But after thinking about it, I had been going full force since Wednesday. Mom has been my shadow. Literally tripping on her. Much like a toddler, I cannot get out of her sight.

I know there are good days, so-so days and bad days. Adjusting from the mountain top to the valley in a moment's notice is hard. With Alzheimer's it literally is from one moment to the next. You can't even say day by day.

I guess I'm negative at the moment. I need to snap out of it..surely not going to change anything.

Getting out..,

For just a bit Steve and I are out of the house.

He brought me to Texas Roadhouse. I'm full. It was so good. Now we will mall walk.

Sam is sitting with mom.

I needed this break.

Saturday, November 24, 2012

My feelings....

We are home. We mall walked. It wasn't crowded at all. Bought nothing. Just enjoyed looking. We ended up at Sam's club and I bought three gallons of milk. Ha ha.

We were so full from our yummy dinner at Texas Roadhouse so the walking helped. Then I treated us to TCBY. Back to being full! Ha!

Now I feel selfish. I had talked to Sam a couple of times while we were out. He said mom was asleep. I was excited! But as soon as she heard me, she got out of bed fully dressed. And wanting a snack. And wanting to know where her purse was. And wanting to know which "sleepers" she should wear to bed. I was so flustered. Sam and friend cooked a pizza ... Plates and glasses were not in the right place. Crumbs on counter. The dogs wanted in and Barney has managed to mess up our door and part of our patio. Ugh, I became so stressed and lost it! What happened to my relaxation?

I shouldn't have lost it. I've apologized. But I still feel guilty and stressed. I'm in bed now, hoping sleep comes soon.

Please pray we can go to church tomorrow. I so need fellowship.

Southaven, MS

Look up their mayor . Greg Davis.

Why is this man still in office?


Selfishness or Bargain Hunting??!

I'm watching news video from shopping yesterday. Unreal.

I've only been out one time on the Friday after Thanksgiving. And that was after lunch.

Just doesn't seem worth it to me. I've found better bargains toward the middle of December.

I wonder if people are embarrassed when they see theirselves on television fighting over yoga pants? Probably not.

From Charles Stanley....

God doesn't need anything from you, but He desires your loving devotion and intimate fellowship. Is that what you want too? If so, are you willing to make the necessary commitment? Seeking the Lord cannot be hurried. It will cost you time and effort, but the rewards are worth any sacrifice.

Scripture Ref: Psalm 27:4-8

Gone With The Wind

I heard this story growing up and even now she will tell it.

When she was a young girl mom and a couple of others skipped school to go see Gone With The Wind at the next town. They had to walk of course...she said they charged snack and drinks on her mother's account at the store. She said she had so much fun that day.

I don't know when this happened she would have been nine years old when it came out. But it is one of my favorite stories.

I share this because the movie is on right now.

Forgot to tell you.....

Figured out where the majority of washcloths were going. Mom confuses the kitchen garbage with the laundry hamper. I watched her yesterday. This on top of her hiding them.

I need to find a SMALL clothes hamper for the bathroom. Hopefully that will help.

Wide awake!

I'm wide awake. I just took a load of clothes out of dryer and put one in. And took care of clean dishes. That was after laying here for a bit.

Sam is awake...we talked for a few. He hugged me with those boy/man arms. When did he get so big? The dogs were sleeping in chairs..they gave me the look as if to ask why I was disturbing them? Tori should be home soon from work. And they will sleep with her.

Mom has slept through the night. She did not take naps yesterday. Thursday all she wanted to do was sleep. Today is bath and hair day. That is a hoot! I'm sure we sound hilarious. :) I'm always worn out and stressed afterwards. Every time I give mom her bath, I text Melecia to let her know she does not make enough money. Mom is very very demanding during bath time. I'm so stressed by the time we finish. Did I mention that already? Ha ha.

I hope to get out of the house today and take a break from mom. I need the break. I want to see the movie Lincoln. Steve another. Red Dawn I believe. We shall see.

I'm anxiously waiting to hear the sweet sound of Tori's car.


Friday, November 23, 2012


I have pictures to post. Somehow I can't do it from my phone.

I decorated today for Christmas. Looks nice. I don't do much on the outside, but will do that tomorrow.

Mom real clingy today. I would literally trip on her.

My sister needed help with some cooking for guests she was having over so early this morning I made two dishes for her. Also gave my youngest nephew some stuff that belonged to my dad.

Focus on the Family has been awesome this week. Please listen.

I receive about three devotionals via email each day. I so enjoy them. I'm thankful for the modern technology that is being used to glorify God and teach others.

I'm tired. Going to bed. I can't wait to share my pictures.

Thanksgiving wrap up..,

It was a good day.

We had a couple of extra folks, Steve's two uncles. Shhh..they are two of my favorite people on his side. They came Saturday but were going to be alone today and we weren't having that!

I so cheated on baking...I bought two pies. Melecia made us cherry cheese cake. The rest of the food was good. I kept it simple. Everyone enjoyed it. Mom enjoyed the company, and immediately fell asleep after she ate. I don't think she felt that great and pretty much snoozed all afternoon and went to bed early.

Both kids were invited to other dinners so, they headed out.

Then the uncles, Steve and I sat around and talked about any and everything. No TV! It was nice.

And I did watch the parade on TV as I cooked and picked up the house. I want to go to New York one day.

It was a good day. We have a good God!

Mom, the dust mop and the sweater.

Most people who go to the store early Thanksgiving morning are going because they forgot rolls, cream cheese or eggs.

Not me.

The head on our dust mop wore out. I wonder why. Mom mops all the time. She was not going to have it. She worried to death about the mop. Finally, I just run to Dollar General and bought a new one. She was so happy.

Mom was looking for her sweater. She was near tears. I join the search. It could not have gone far. She just took it off to wash up. We searched high and low. No sweater. I told her I needed to get back to cooking and gave her another one to put on. I went back to cooking. Mom came in the kitchen with the missing sweater, she found it. I asked her where it was...she said "you know where you lay your head."She had stuffed it in her pillow case.

Whew! Two major problems solved!

Thursday, November 22, 2012


1 Thessalonians 5:18 “Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.”

I want to say I'm living this verse. That with the below posts I'm feeling all spiritual and not in the flesh. But I can't.

Mom is not good today. She woke me up by knocking on walls and doors. Thank goodness for extra locks. She is starting to not sleep again. Sleep is a valuable commodity. I'm so grateful for the rest I received last weekend.

She has a new thing of carrying around a suitcase. I can't figure that one out. In it is just random things, things important to her.

Last night she literally sorted her closet for two hours. I would ask her if I could help and she said no. She was looking for something, what, I don't know.

When I arrived home after work and stopping at the store along with 10,000 other people, she was a wreck. I just had to sit down with her a minute and love on her.

I hate the disease and what it does. Is that wrong?

Another writing from Charles Stanley

Nov 22, 2012

It Is Good to Give Thanks to God

Read | Psalm 92:1-5

Have you ever wondered why the Bible repeatedly tells us to give thanks to the Lord? The main reason is because He deserves it. Everything you are and have comes from Him. He created you and is the One who keeps your heart beating. To claim your life as your own and to do as you please is the ultimate ingratitude. God created you to love Him and sacrificed enormously to deliver you from your sin and make you His child. Expressing thanksgiving to the Lord is a way of honoring Him by acknowledging all that He has done.

Most of us would probably have to admit that our prayers tend to be rather self-centered. We come with our list of requests, but how much time do we spend thanking God for what He has already accomplished? The psalmist advises us to begin each day by focusing on His lovingkindness as we look forward, trusting Him with all our concerns. Then in the evening, we should thank Him for His faithfulness and take note of all the ways He provided for our needs and guided our way.

Even if the day has brought pain or difficulty, we can still thank God for His presence as He carried us through, and for His promise to work everything out to our benefit (Rom. 8:28).

This week, take time to remember what the Lord has done for you, and express your thanks to Him. Be creative and think of all the ways you can show gratitude--then sing, praise, and joyfully worship Him. By keeping your focus on God, you can have an attitude of gratitude all day long.

Proverbs 31 Ministries

I copied this post from the devotional I receive. Check them out. Awesome! Carla, My friend/sister, from other parents led me to them. Another good one is Girlfriends in God.

November 22, 2012

Grateful or Guilt-Ridden
By Glynnis Whitwer
"O Lord, I am your servant; yes, I am your servant, born into your household; you have freed me from my chains. I will offer you a sacrifice of thanksgiving and call on the name of the Lord." Psalm 116:16-17 (NLT)

King David really messed up. Not the "oops-I-snapped-at-my-husband-again" type of mistake. Rather, the Bible tells us David committed adultery with a soldier's wife, then had the innocent man killed to cover up the act. Talk about a condition for guilt.

While I haven't walked in David's sandals, I do know what it's like to feel guilt and shame over what I've done ... or haven't done. It can be all-consuming.

Guilt wraps its way around your mind and heart until it chokes out the truth. You avoid people, situations and places. Embarrassment leads you into disobedience. Guilt hisses lies like:

• He'll never forgive you.
• You're the worst mother on the planet.
• What kind of Christian does that?
• Just give up; you'll never do better.

I wonder if David heard lies too. After all, God took him from a shepherd's field to the king's throne. The guilt at letting down the God he loved, and a soldier who trusted him, must have been intense.

After David had blown it, he could have given up trying to be a man of God. Who would respect him after such shameful behavior? But David didn't give up.

Rather than pulling back from life, he pressed into God.

And God forgave David and continued to use him for years.

Half of David's situation is common. We all make mistakes. We all fall short. We all need a Savior. The other half, the redemption, isn't so common. Too many people sit on the sidelines after a wrong choice, guilt-ridden and convinced they are disqualified from service. So why was David's story different? How was David restored to a position of honor and respect after behaving so shamefully?

The answer is whispered and shouted throughout the book of Psalms. We hear it in David's prayers and poems. Rather than living with a sentence of guilt, David chose to be grateful. He turned attention from himself to His God - and that changed everything.

David sought God's forgiveness with a sincere heart (Psalm 51). He was truly repentant. But then, his focus turned to thankfulness. Psalm 116 records David's words: "O LORD, I am your servant; yes, I am your servant, born into your household; you have freed me from my chains. I will offer you a sacrifice of thanksgiving and call on the name of the LORD." (vs. 16 & 17)

Thankfulness is hard to come by when we feel like the scum of the earth. It feels like a sacrifice to offer praise instead of allowing our hearts to sink into self-pity with thoughts like, "I'll never change." "I'm such a failure."

Although he was deeply aware of his own lack, David focused on God's character, power and majesty. And when he did, thankfulness overflowed - silencing the lies about his worth and potential.

Most of us won't go to the extremes David did, but sinful decisions can bring about a guilt-ridden condition that manifests itself in negative thinking and reduced potential. Thankfully, David's example shows me that I don't have to stay there. Yes, I'm a big mess at times. But gratefulness sings these truths:

• God's grace is sufficient.
• When you are weak, He is strong.
• You've been forgiven; you are a new creation.
• Don't dwell on the past, God is doing a new thing.

Gratefulness changes my perspective and opens my heart to the truth. And it's your truth as well. Jesus has already paid the price for our sins, so we don't have to pay it every day through guilt. When we humbly seek His forgiveness (and the forgiveness of others when necessary) our sins are forgiven. Through Christ's sacrifice we are set free.

Dear Lord, today I desperately need Your forgiveness. Please forgive me for what I've done and what I've not done. Help me to exchange the lies of the enemy for Your truth. Create a clean spirit within me so that I can serve You all the days of my life. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Tori and Sam..

I love you. I am thankful every day to call you daughter and son.

I'm blessed.

Out there....forever...

To my Tori and her friends.

Things you post are out there forever. Even if you delete it.

Choose your words.

Be a light not a broken light bulb.

I love ya!

Prayer updates...

Debbie at work is still sick. She and her hubby are anxiously waiting test results for him.

Julie's mom was admitted to the hospital today. She is in a long term care facility, she fell twice from weakness, has dimentia, and has very low potassium.

Penni is doing better after surgery.

Barb and her family are going through their first Thanksgiving without her dad.

So many hurting.


I am sluggish this morning. I woke up cold and I don't like being cold.

Mom is semi-stirring around, I think she has gone back to bed.

Please pray, I have a lot on my mind. I'm sad for a couple of reasons, worrying about other things.

I'm looking forward to tomorrow. Thanksgiving with my four favorite people. I need to put my turkey in the fridge. We will decorate for Christmas this weekend. I am also looking forward to time off. I really don't plan on shopping. I hope we rest like we did last weekend.

Happy Wednesday.

Charles Stanley

I am copying this entire devotion from Charles Stanley's In Touch Devotional.


Nov 21, 2012

The Benefits of Gratitude

Read | Psalm 105:1-5

Thanking God glorifies and magnifies Him, but did you know doing this also benefits us? The Lord doesn't need our thanks, but we need to give it so we can become what He wants us to be: unselfish, encouraged, and confident. Giving thanks...

Refocuses our attention: Life is filled with situations and distractions that keep us from seeing all that God has done for us. Instead of getting out of bed with the weight of the world on your shoulders, try refocusing on the Lord by thanking Him for His past provisions, guidance, and faithfulness.

Relieves anxiety: Since our fast-paced society has lots of pressure, expectations, and responsibilities, many people live in constant anxiety. But when we bring our concerns to the Lord with thanksgiving, the burden shifts to Him, and His peace comes to us (Phil. 4:6-7).

Refreshes our relationship: Gratitude keeps us from thinking that the Christian walk is all about us and our needs. Our fellowship with God is enhanced because we're focused on Him instead of ourselves.

Reinforces our faith: When we thank the Lord for His past faithfulness, our confidence in His present faithfulness soars.

Rejoices our spirit: Thanksgiving is the best way to dig ourselves out of the doldrums of discouragement.

Although gratitude is always beneficial, it's not always easy. When you're discouraged or overwhelmed, it's probably not on your radar to thank God. But I've learned from experience that shifting focus and thanking the Lord for all He's done is the fastest way to change one's attitude and reenergize.

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

All points bulletin or BOLO....

On washcloths!

Where are they disappearing to? I am thinking mom has thrown them away or has hidden them extremely well.

My towels and washcloths are looking pitiful... I need to work on replacing them soon.

But in the meantime. Please be on the look out of my washcloths.


I normally don't cross my holidays. But I had the time, I have my first few presents wrapped.

Whoo hoo!

Missing my dad....

My dad went to heaven in June 2002. I have been thinking about him all day.

When I went to lunch I went down this one street and saw this older man raking his yard. And I remembered dad wearing his 49er hat, blue jean jacket, raking his yard.

His smile and love of a good joke.

Happy Thanksgiving dad. Mom is doing ok.

Coffee Pot...

This morning just as I was getting in the shower I heard mom screaming, literally screaming....

I ran in the kitchen and saw that the coffee pot had broke. Coffee everywhere.Actually the handle broke off. Mom was screaming trying to wipe all of it up with a napkin. Im trying to make sure mom is not cut or burned she's still screaming, and trying to wipe up the mess with one napkin, coffee cup in hand. Tori comes into the kitchen and makes toast and such..couldn't wait until mom was calm and the mess cleaned up. Her comment? "This is just too much for me to handle." So she left with her toast. Leaving me with spilled coffee, upset mom, a soaked napkin and running late for work.

What a way to start the day. Whew!

Monday, November 19, 2012


Please please pray for Debbie and her husband. He has been sick and he is not getting well. She is sick with sinus and ear infections.

Debbie works in our Ohio office and is so sweet.

Many prayer needs at work.

Dolls and Toys

Mom still loves her Happy Meal toys. She has a basket of them.

I asked my sister Judy to keep her eyes open for a realistic baby doll or a stuffed toy that is interactive.

I've been reading about doll therapy for Alzheimer's patients. There is a website for dolls designed with them in mind. But $94 is steep! Or I'm cheap. I bet I can find one at Walmart. And Judy is looking too.

I can't believe I'm talking about getting my mother a doll. But I have a strong feeling she will like it.

Sunday, November 18, 2012


Charlie, my sweet funny brother-in-law lost his mother this weekend. She had been sick for awhile.

A pastor once said... "Your momma is your momma is your momma."

How true that is!

Please be in prayer for him.

Thankful for hard times...

I know we aren't supposed to look back. But sometimes you must - so you..,so I can see how far God carried me. How He literally showed up!

I often wonder why we have to go through the things we do. It is for us to grow and for His glory.

Lord, forgive me for not "Considering it pure joy...." as you tell us in James. Thank you Lord for the hard times and for never leaving me, when I often turn my back and fret so. Thank you for your constant provision. Thank you for the cross. Thank you for loving me.


I am thankful for my friends. I am blessed beyond belief to have some awesome ladies in my life.

Sunday Nap

Mom and I took a Sunday nap! Whoo hoo. I love Sunday Naps.

I hope it doesn't keep her awake tonight. I don't think it will. She does think it is morning. I just warmed her a plate. She wasn't too sure about leftovers for breakfast. Ha!

Now the cook can enjoy....


I don't know about you but when I cook a huge meal over two days I don't feel like eating.

Today I'm enjoying the left overs... This recipe in particular......and it totally falls into my six ingredient or less recipe rule.

Slow Cooker Corn

4 cups frozen corn
1 package (8 ounces) cream cheese
stick butter
Salt and pepper to taste

Melt cream cheese and butter in microwave. Spray slow cooker/Crock Pot with vegetable spray. Put melted cream cheese and butter in slow cooker. Add corn, salt and pepper. Cover and cook in slow cooker for two hours on LOW. Serves 6 to 8.


Consequences of breaking the rules..,,

Normally I follow the six ingredient rule...if it takes over six ingredients I stay away from it. Mind you this is my own rule.

Now there MAY be an exception in casseroles and soups.

My horrible banana pudding had nine ingredients. I broke my own rule and there were consequences! A ha!

Just let me do it.....not!

Mom is trying to be independent. She is in the kitchen trying to make a sandwich and cut up some fruit.

However, I've had to go in there several times for different reasons - but wants to do it herself. It's hard not to say..."just let me do it." She needs and wants to do things for herself. I have to be...I need to be more patient.


Mom didn't feel too hot this morning. In fact she was still sleeping at 7:50 and I wasn't about to rock the boat. No church services tonight ... A church wide dinner... I doubt we will go.

I'm tired from weekend of cooking. Amazing how that can be exhausting.

Steve and his brother are working on my car heater. They've flushed the coils, replaced the thermostat. Still no they are looking at something else. I went without the heater last year. Ugh!

Tori has kept a promise of buying Sam a game he wanted. She did it because he gave up his room for her and mema and for all the help he gave her when she moved two times. He hasn't seen it yet - he spent the night and went to church with a friend. He will be so excited. She wrote the sweetest note to go with it. I'm more proud of the note than the game. She told me she had a sweet moment and not to get all sentimental. Lol. Sam and his dry self will say something similar.

I'm trying to be lazy and mom is not having it. Ha!

Happy Sunday. God is an awesome God.

Saturday, November 17, 2012

Thanksgiving Dinner

We had Steve's family over tonight for Thanksgiving. His boys came also.

My banana pudding was a disaster. It didn't taste right. However my peanut butter cake and brownies were awesome!

Turkey, ham, dressing and veggies all were good. Just call me Betty Crocker...except for the banana pudding. It was so nice to hear everyone laughing and talking.

Mom went to bed while everyone was here. But she enjoyed the company for a bit.

This girl is wiped out. Mom is much like a toddler she followed me all day. I gave her jobs to do like folding napkins, dusting, etc..she just wanted to be right by me.
I also gave her a bath and did her hair after breakfast.

Prayerfully we will go to church in the morning.


A lady I work with lost her father yesterday,sudden illness.

Please be in prayer.


I guess it is another thing lost to Alzheimer's.

Mom cannot do zippers. I surely don't understand.


I've had two of the best nights sleep I've had in a long time. Coupled with the day off...I just feel less stressed and have a clearer mind.

Mom has rested well also.

Lord, thank you for the gift of rest. The quietness and peacefulness of the night.

Charles Stanley

To avoid disappointment with God, understand that His actions and character always align. He won't reward rebellion or laziness, and His answers to prayer fit with His goal of conforming us to Christ's image. If He's withholding something you deem essential, He's working something even better for you.

Scripture ref: Psalm 84:11-12

Jill Savage Friday Quote......

“Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.”

- Author unknown

Thank Carla for sharing!! Love ya!

Friday, November 16, 2012


It was a good day off.

I cleaned house...even moved fridge and cleaned underneath stove. Well!

Mom was pretty quiet all day. She didn't want to help clean. Which is unusual for her.

We managed to have a good shopping trip to wal-mart. Walked the entire store one time .. She was tuckered.

We came home and I got started on baking.

Mom went to bed early.

I'm tired! Night.

A do nothing day....

I am off. No doctor appointments, no child support court, no meeting with social services.

Just off.

I'm going to clean and get ready for Steve's family coming over for dinner tomorrow. And mom and I will go to store and such. Then I will make a few desserts. But I don't have to rush!

I'm off. We slept late. Ate a good breakfast.

Whoo hoo

Sad Mom

Mom is crying a lot lately.

This is new and hard to handle. When I arrived home from work Thursday from one stressful day..I had images of resting and mom going to bed early. Well, that didn't happen.

Mom was a wreck. So, I called my sister and told her we were on our way to visit. Very smart thing to do. Now mind you nothing she talked about made sense. The only thing that was clear was when she talked about Melecia. She loves Melecia. Blew my sister away. But she had a good visit.

Mom cheered up, we came home and went to bed. It is 2:30 and I'm awake , mom is sleeping.

I'm off Friday. We will be getting ready for an early Thanksgiving dinner we are hosting Saturday with Steve's family. Mom will enjoy helping and enjoy the company.

Pray we have a good, restful and peaceful day.

Thursday, November 15, 2012


Remember single parents this Thanksgiving and Christmas season.

Anything you can it. Don't ask... just do it. Allow God to lead you.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Prayer requests....

A few from work

Penni- she had gallbladder surgery. She has no family here. Mom and I took her a meal cooked wonderfully and graciously by Melecia's hands. She made enough for moms lunch too. And I think there will be enough for tomorrow.

Debbie- her hubby has been in the hospital now they are waiting for test results.

There are a couple of others but I don't have permission to write about them. God knows and He cares. Pray for these unspoken.

My sister's mother-in- law is not expected to live much longer. My brother-in-law took news hard. There have been some bad feelings for a few years...but I think there has been some reconciliation.

Mom--more moments of clarity. For all of us to rest. I'm worn out tonight.

A fall

Mom fell today. She seems to be okay.

She was going to sit down and she missed the chair. She has a bump on her arm, bottom and head. But she is walking and talking as normal. Well as normal as an Alzheimer patient can be.

Pray she does okay and there are no long term side effects from the fall.

Tutoring or Torture?

Sam is now in tutoring after school three days a week.

He is not happy about it.

I was teasing him this morning after he fussed about it.."you'll thank me some day." He looked at me and said "ummmmm no!"

He really thinks its torture. He'll be strong. Ha ha ha


Is not fun.

Something about 2:00 am. I wake up every night.


Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Oswald Chambers

I peeked at tomorrow's devotion...

"We have to be so one with God that we do not continually need to ask for guidance."

Scripture ref.. Genesis 24:27

Grey Sweatpants

Mom calls them sleepers. She sleeps in them.

As she was getting ready for bed tonight I kept hearing drawers and her closet doors open up, she came out of her room saying "Where are they?" I had no idea what she was talking about. Then it hit me - in the utility room was a pair of her jogging pants on the dryer ready to be put up.

She knew something of hers was missing. I took them to her, she hung them up and went to bed.

Blows my mind how this disease "works"..I surely don't understand it. I guess I'm not meant to.

She was not feeling that great tonight. Prayerfully she will rest. I'm tired from last night.

Old fashioned fried chicken

Is good. But sure is messy.

Thankful for God's provision!

I wish...I pray....

If you are a woman you just have to say "I am cramping" or "I was in labor 23 hours." And you will find that most women will relate. And in case of the former all pain relievers will appear out of no where.

If you are a parent you just have to say "he has colic" or "he's two" or "she is a teenager" or "she got her license today." And you will receive all kinds of nods and murmurs of understanding. You will receive a lot of advice.

But right now I wish I had someone to has emptied her sock drawer again, she has some stomach problems tonight and I had to clean the bathroom and wash some clothes and it is 1:30 a.m. And getting her back to bed much less asleep may be a miracle. I know I'm not the only one in this boat..but it sure is lonely at the moment.

God,I pray, I need you so badly. I'm tired. I'm discouraged. I often wonder if you see..I know you do. I don't understand this disease and its purpose. Thank you for not leaving me Lord, especially in the middle of the night at the washing machine and my weak stomach and strong doubts. Thank you for loving me, thank you for the Cross.

Monday, November 12, 2012


Thinking about the below post....

Why is it hard to wear all the hats you need to wear in life? Why is it hard for those you love to understand you may need to just be mom for a bit? Or wife? Why do they get upset?

I guess I just need to take the moments as they come. And wear one hat or several at one time if needed.

But how do you do it without the guilt?


I had to give myself an attitude check. I was getting frustrated and impatient with everyone.

Not good. Lord forgive me for not being kind to the ones who deserve it!

Sam has completed his science project. I've been teaching him power point. I helped type. He quizzed mom a few times made pretty good observations and I think if he adds personal observations in his verbal presentation that will be neat.

Sleeping mom and sleeping Barney

Mom is not by nature a dog lover. She doesn't really like my dogs - doesn't enjoy having them in the house.  This was after our busy day Saturday and after the dogs had a bath...

Both are sound asleep on the couch.  Too funny and too cute!

If you look at the time - it is only 5:00 PM. 

Lunch time mom.....

This little lady today for lunch - ate two pieces of Shake 'n Bake Chicken, three rolls and a whole head of cabbage. Yet she never gains weight. 

This picture was taken right after her perm on Saturday.


Remember my Saturday night..freshening up the house fall?

I am so sore. I knew I fell hard...but Geesh! I'm really hurting in my lower back and left leg. What's up with the pain in my neck and shoulders? The pain is pretty bad at this moment..I'm waiting for the Advil to kick in.


Sunday, November 11, 2012

Award winning???

Same cook book as below....

A lot of the recipes indicate they were an award winner. How many award winners can you have? Who decided this?

Digging through moms recipes and cookbooks I found the banana bread recipe I used in a 4-h contest in 5th grade and I won. A blue ribbon. I was so excited.


Going through cookbooks...I am reading one that has a lot of wildlife recipes in it.

Some of the recipes are as follows:

Doves in easy gravy
Dove 'n deer
Dove breast and bacon over charcoal
Fried soft-shell turtle
Fried Garlic quail
Barbecued raccoon
Broiled frog legs
Skillet possum
Smoked frogs

Ummmmm.... I'm gonna stick to my policy if it can be a Disney Character I don't think I'll eat it.

Veteran's Day

Some lessons are taught and absorbed outside the classroom.

Sam loves our country. He respects the flag and all that it means. He has the upmost respect for veterans. He has been known to tear up as the National Anthem plays...and I'm not kidding.

So with that being said....instead of school tomorrow, Sam will be participating in Veteran's day activities. He is excited and honored. So if you are one of his teachers he is not playing hooky...he is learning outside the classroom.

Whoo hoo! Church!

We went to church this morning! It felt so good to be there. It has been a long time since we made it to Sunday morning services.

Crosspointe in Millington. I love our church family.

The message from Pastor Mark was so good. I so appreciate his humbleness and down to earth style.

My best friend Diane's daughter sang during offering and she was the best I've ever heard her sing! I'm so proud of her. Her voice was strong and clear. She had confidence! I love you girlie.

Never take your church and worship for granted.

God is so good!

Keeping my mouth shut..,

Is hard for me to do especially when I see someone who I wash clothes for is making ummmmm a STUPID mistake.

Deuteronomy 6? Can I just take a Bible and give a whack on the head?

Where's the manual?

Well, obviously in Sam's eyes I made a huge mistake yesterday.

In the salon where I took mom and eventually brought Sam back to... Works a girl Sam goes to school with. Her mom is a hairdresser.

She recognized me as his mom and talked to me the whole time as she swept, sorted supplies, etc. She said Sam looked like me. Ha ! I wonder how he would feel if I told him that. Anyway, she told me a few funny stories about Sam in school. She warmed my heart when she told me that Sam is nice to everyone, especially girls and ladies. That he opens doors, carries things without being asked.

After I picked Sam up and brought him back...he saw her.. she went right back to talking to me. He was dirty from bring obviously this somehow is an indicator that I was not supposed to talk to the girl. When we got in the car, he said" mom, I'm dirty and I stink..why were you talking to her?"

Well, excuse me! Didn't know that rule! I have a teen boy - where's the manual?

Sliding and a bump.

I decided Saturday night to "freshen" up the house. I dusted, wiped, swept and mopped. Our floors are really slick when wet - well yours truly obviously is not a graceful ballerina - I slid on our wet floor-twisted left ankle and fell- bumped my head. I'm feeling the results of the fall. And not in places that I felt original pain! Whew!

Maybe I should give up on nightly freshening.

Saturday, November 10, 2012

Cranberry Sauce....

How many people actually eat it?


Today has been busy.

I woke up with and still have a pounding headache. It is bad I'm just sick with it. Ugh!

I decided that I'm retiring my perm rollers. I took mom for a professional perm and trim. It looks great! There is a reason those folks have a license. Sam was at a church thing and while I was at the salon with mom he called to be picked up. So I left her there, picked him up and brought him to salon for his #3 buzz. He does look better. Mom did great the ladies know her and she feels safe so I went into a store right there and picked up my 1st Christmas present of the season...Steve's! Whoo hoo. I've ordered mom's a black pair of the shoes she likes so much. She has a beige pair and sometimes when ahe dresses she will say "I wish I had a black pair." They are SAS. They support her ankles and give her comfortable support. She loves them and I hope she will wear them.

After the salon we went grocery shopping and bought gas. I bought our turkey for Thanksgiving. Then stopped by my sisters to drop off some things, then took everyone to Burger King.

With the busy day mom was a champ. I'm glad we were able to get out. Praying we can go to church tomorrow.

I hope to give the dogs a bath here shortly.

I have clean sheets to put on beds.

Have a good night.


Mom knows when I'm off and will not sleep!

Friday, November 09, 2012


When do your kids get it?

When does common sense prevail?


Rough day...

I have been fussed at, yelled at, cussed at in every shape and form today. I had one lady scream and rant and call me a couple of names. Her voice became so high pitched she started crying.

Over cabinets, parts, shipments! Unreal. I've been beat down a lot today. Again over cabinets.

I never lost it. I never threw anyone under the bus.... but it got to me. After the screaming lady I had to step outside to clear my head.

Please be patient with customer service folks. I promise they are only doing what they can! They are like me they see what is on the computer. And more than likely while you are talking they are working on your problem with other offices via chat, email and notes to the one behind her. Sometimes I will go into the warehouse myself to see where an order is at. I've put cabinets together following the same directions just to learn. I call in on our phone system to see what is so frustrating about it. I've studied every bit of our web-site. Because I care and it is my job. I should work harder. I should honor God all day

We do so much more for not that much pay. But blessed to have a job! God is good!

But when it is all said and done it is a cabinet. Not life threatening. Or if you order patient. Be kind to the cashier, the waitress, and the stock clerk. Be kind to everyone!


A few weeks ago, I decided to put up some of mom’s shirts and blouses. She wore them over and over. She has this closet full of clothes – but continued to wear the same thing over and over. It literally was driving me nuts.

Shame on me! I totally messed up.

I realized yesterday, like her sweater and her purse, those little blouses somehow help her feel safe and secure.

After she was in a deep sleep, I snuck into her room and hung about 5 blouses up in random places. I have you know this morning; she put on her very favorite striped top. She was so happy.

I learned a valuable lesson. I have never been one to put stock into clothes and such. I am a simple gal. But for some reason it was bothering me that mom wore the same thing all the time. I was thinking “What would people think?” I allowed my pride to get the best of me. As long as mom is clean, healthy and happy – who cares what she is wearing? If it makes her feel good – then I feel good.

God, please forgive me for my selfish pride. Forgive me for not considering mom’s feelings and what she would like. Thank you for the blessing of having Martha Horn as my mother. Thank you for the opportunity for mom to be my ministry. Thank you for renewed energy and Your provision each day.

They still give them out......

Sam brought this home from school......

(I still have mine from 5th grade - I think it is cool they are giving out in 8th grade!)

(The cover is neat looking!)

Thursday, November 08, 2012

Isaiah 49:16

See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands.....

Imagine God looking at His hands seeing your name and love pouring out. Wow!

Oswald Chambers

.....if a man attracts by his personality, his appeal is along that line, if he is identified with his Lords personality, then the appeal is along the line of what Jesus Christ can do. The danger is to glory in men; Jesus says we are to lift Him up.

Scrip ref Col 1:24

All I can say in the light of this week is wow!


Hey Homeschool mom..I turned off the TV last night! It was awesome. It is off right now.

I'm using the time to clip coupons I hope to remember next grocery trip. And I will read God's word.

Quiet is an awesome thing.

Today on Focus

On today's Focus on the Family is a program about the election. Mike Huckabee is the guest.

It is awesome. I strongly encourage you to listen to it.

He has so much wisdom, discernment,and is so true to values and God's word.

Listen to it!


Today started off rough.

Mom was sad mom. She woke up crying. She literally hung onto me. I couldn't leave her..not even for the thirty or so minutes between Melecia and I.

So during this time I did some of the tests with her Sam needs for science project. I can honestly say she is between the years 1940-50 in her mind. I could have cried. She has no memory of her children or grandchildren.

She did real well on sight words and ok on 1st grade math. She knew how to draw shapes and could not draw hands on a clock. (Classic Alzheimer test...look it up) instead she would circle the numbers for 1:45.

I hate hate this disease. Why why why does it exist? It is beyond cruel. I don't understand.

Wednesday, November 07, 2012

Oswald Chambers...

God by His providence brings you into circumstances that you cannot understand at all, but the spirit of God understands.

Scripture ref: Romans 8:28

Something we need to keep in mind as we pray for our leadership, for each other and ourselves.

Aren't you glad Jesus loves you...loves me!

A lesson from Charles Stanley....

Difficulties are opportunities for us to demonstrate perseverance under pressure.

The father will be with us through every situation to accomplish His good.

Scripture ref...

James 1:1-12
2 Cor 1:3-4
1 Peter 1:6-7, 4:12

Boy did I need this.

God forgive me for not trusting when I should!

A verse...

1 John 2:15

Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.

Campaign signs???

Where did they all go? We got up this morning and all the signs were gone from the neighborhood...the whole town. Did they walk away?

Reasons to love Melecia...

She finds all the hidden pairs of socks and puts them back.

She has mastered bath time.

She is so funny.

She appreciates and values life.

She loves mom.

Selfish thoughts....

I'm having selfish thoughts.

Why is it when we try to do so right, work hard...problems still hit? I know we are not guaranteed a worry free life but it sure would be nice to have a day not hit with tons of problems. Or it seems like tons!

A couple of months ago we received a letter from the IRS saying we owed $4000. Ugh! So I mailed copies and such and we received a letter saying we only owe $2000. Ummm no! So back to sending copies. This is one thing I need to be taken care of.

Financially we have had three + hard years. If it can happen it did. Lost job., income loss, etc. We are just now seeing light. We are working on all debt now the IRS thing. Please pray we can see resolution quickly. I so would like a better paying job...but my employer is so flexible when I need time off with mom. And right now that is important. Very important. There is no savings we lived off of it when I was laid off and when we adjusted to less coming in. Surely we will get there!

Again I feel selfish. I'm sorry if I sound as if I'm poor mouthing. God has always provided. But a little wiggle room surely would be nice!

Thanks for praying.

When you can't sleep....

You just want to whack the one snoring with a pillow.

Well I do anyway. Ha!


I'm glad the election is over.

I know God is in a friend once beautifully said....nothing happens that doesn't filter through His fingertips. He is not surprised.

If your candidate did not win the White House, the Mayor's office, the Alderman's seat, or if the referendum didn't pass....don't speak with venom or bitterness. Pray for those in leadership, pray as things cross their desk that our eyes never see. Pray they seek God before they sign their name or vote on laws.
I can tell you by nature I am a news junkie. I so enjoy the news but I won't watch anything except weather for awhile because quite frankly how many times can something be rehashed? People will talk of moving forward but will be stuck on the streets of shoulda, coulda, woulda.

Lets get help to New Jersey and New York. We help so many other countries. If we can get jets and supplies across the ocean to a country we can't pronounce, we surely can get help to neighborhoods where children play, flowers are planted, neighbors walk, and church bells ring. In my opinion this is where our focus needs to be. Let's take care of our own.

Monday, November 05, 2012

Starving to death.....

That is what mom told me when I arrived home from work...that she was starving to death.

Too funny!

And this is what she ate today:

Morning bowl of cereal
Eggs cooked by Melecia
Lunch of meat loaf, mashed potatoes, and mixed veggies.
For a "snack" cheese toast.
Cookies and milk
Then a supper of chicken, peas and corn--two plates.

Last doctor visit she lost three pounds. Proof to me three meals a day is what we need.



Remember this picture when those in Afghanistan could vote for the 1st time ever? The lines they stood in under conditions we will never face?  How proud they were of their ink stained thumb?

Vote on Tuesday - it does count - it does matter!  Appreciate and praise God for your PRIVILEGE to vote.  God knows who will win tomorrow - we must pray for all our leaders. 

A few of her favorite things........

Mom loves to clean and fold laundry.  And I am not joking.  You should see her clean a kitchen.  Especially behind the faucet....she is good!

Here are few pics....


Brings you joy.

Brings you frustration.

Brings laughter.

Brings tears.

Brings blessings.

Brings exhaustion.

Brings renewed energy.

Brings anger.

Brings peace.

A mystery....

Explain to me why I have a pimple on my chin?

I am 43 years old!

And it is not a little pimple either!


Sunday, November 04, 2012


We went. It was a service to celebrate the release of our choir's CD.

Service went longer than usual,mom grew restless, so we left early. It was nice though. Like water for a parched throat.

Mom literally has been the energizer bunny today going and going going. She literally has been my shadow. Following me everywhere! I go to restroom, open door, she literally is standing right there at door. I feel a tad stressed and nervous. Okay a lot stressed and nervous.

But she's in bed now and hopefully sleep will come fast for both of us. Because there is nothing left in me.

Thank you for your continued prayers.


Mom and I came to Sam's club to get meat. It is cheaper.

Their produce is cheaper. And milk.

We walked the whole store twice. Mom did great! We are now eating a grilled chicken salad at one of my favorite places....Colton's. when I worked in Bartlett I ate here on my 14 hour day. A family has the nerve to be in my booth! Hmmph! And Myra my favorite waitress is not here! But it is still so good!

We plan to go to church tonight. Pray mom continues to do well.

Closet doors, sock drawer and other things...

Mom's room is right next to ours. I have decided she is louder than the kids. Ha ha!

I have heard her closet doors open about a dozen times. I am guessing she forgets she has already done something. And she opens her sock drawer. And only her sock drawer. Dozens of times. The only reason I know it is her sock drawer and not others is that that one drawer makes a certain sound. I'm going to be honest, I hate that sound. I guess it is a petty thing...but I really do.

In other things.......

We have decided to just shoot for a regular Sunday night schedule for church. Then if we can go in the mornings....great. I just miss church.
I miss every aspect of it. Fellowship and worship with fellow believers is important. I feel stronger for some reason. But I will use this time to just rest, relax, and read. But I am praying we can go on Sunday mornings real soon. Mom just doesn't like to get ready and cleaned up in the morning.

Sam has a science project due soon. We put our heads together and he is going to do it on short term and long term memory....Alzheimer's . I'm hoping this will teach him more about what mom is going through.

Saturday, November 03, 2012


This has been a busy but productive day.

I managed to finish the crockpot meals. And they were good!

Cleaned house. Gave mom a bath which is a chore! She's very demanding. Then I mowed our yard I'm thinking for the last time this season. Wish I had a good weed eater and a push mower to detail it a tad more. Steve changed oil in both vehicles.

My sister offered to sit with mom so we could go out. She got a taste of my totally misbehaved. Whew! She finally went to bed and I haven't heard her all night. Her doctor gave us a medicine to use only if she is super agitated. It was used last night. I know now she just misses Melecia..and no matter how I try to duplicate the routine, she so misses"little girl." (her name for Melecia) Mom loves her!

But when we left the movie, we had planned to go to Sam's club to price meat...but received a call one son was broke down and needed rescuing. (Only us...1st night out in forever...and someone needs our help in the dark on a busy Memphis interstate exit.)

By the way, we saw the movie Flight. Denzel Washington should be nominated for an Oscar...fine acting job. You lose yourself in his pain and fight. But the language and other scenes were tough. I so wish Hollywood would realize it's okay to make a movie without the language and other junk. The success of Courageous, Facing the Giants, The Blind Side and others should tell them that.

I'm wore out!


This whole not sleeping thing......

I slept through the night on Thursday. A rare occurance for me. It is 5:00 am and I've been wide awake almost three hours.

Pre Alzheimer mom I would just get up and clean, iron, etc. Now I'm afraid to make too much noise. But I did get up for a bit and started a load of clothes, put some chicken in the crockpot for a casserole and a small roast in another for sandwiches for the weekend. I intend for these two "meals" to be my only cooking besides weekend breakfast. They should last. My hubby is a picky eater. Meat and potatoes kind a guy. He doesn't like soups and casseroles. Nothing! Makes it hard. So I have this idea in my head to cook a couple of different things on the weekend for us to eat on. We shall see. I hope it doesn't make me feel like I'm running a dinner. Ha. But I so enjoy casseroles and soups!

When I wake up - I wake up completely. My eyes pop open and my mind starts turning.

As I'm writing .... I am thinking I should use this time in prayer and in His word. I bet I would have better days. Not perfect days...just days with peace and joy that comes only from God.

I do need to prioritize and put things into perspective. To not make a big deal over the small stuff.

Well I'm going to try to snooze for a bit....

The downside to grocery shopping....

They eat it!

Ha ha ha

The washing of the sweater....

Mom spilled a drink on her beloved sweater.

I needed to wash it. Convincing her of that was another story!

I had to wait until she was asleep...tiptoe in her room using the skills learned as a young mom. Washed the sweater, dried it and tiptoed back to hang it up. Normally, I would allow it to "drip dry" but this was not the time. If that sweater is not in her closet...the day does not get off to a good start. And a good start is key! That would be as bad if not worse than not having Rice Krispies!


Grocery Shopping....

Last night (Fri) I took mom grocery shopping with me. (This was after vowing to not do it again..because the last few trips to store with mom were a disaster and ended with both of us stressed out)

I shopped at our locally owned store first to pick up only those things I can find there plus a few of their specials.
Then went to a Kroger - one that hasn't been reset. It is just right! They weren't crowded and it was enjoyable . I was able to stay on track even though I forgot my coupons! Ugh!

More importantly mom did great. She would help find one item on each aisle.
I'm thinking this is the store and the time I will shop at from now on.

Afterwards I took her to McDonalds for a Happy Meal. She didn't like the toy though!

She was slightly mixed up when we arrived home...but she finally settled.

Thursday, November 01, 2012


Mom has gone to bed. She was confused mom tonight. She had a good day and enjoyed the fish I brought wasn't in me.

But for some reason I'm grouchy and short with everyone else. I feel pulled in every direction, stressed,nervous and anxious ...I just need to be.

I'm praying for a good weekend. We all need it.

Teaching Sam.....

Sam is not very patient with mom. He tries to reason with her. And if you know anything about Alzheimer's - you cannot reason with one who has this hateful disease. Trying to will result in two people being upset.

So I have to teach him. I must do so by being a better example.

I must use shorter sentences. I must talk slower. I must not argue. I have to be positive.


I did not win. 

I am trying not to be depressed or sad.

I really did not lose anything.  But I gained feelings of happiness knowing so many people cared.

(Ok, I have to be honest, I am trying not to cry)

Taller than me...,,

One kid came up last night and I teased him. He is Sam's age. I told him since he was taller than me he couldn't have candy....he crouched down.

Ha ha ha

A memory....

I commented on another blog earlier the following.....

I remember walking with my dad every Halloween. The costumes came in a box and they tied in the back, the mask was plastic held by an elastic band. I think I was Barbie a few times.
I remember dad checking my candy and "keeping" a few pieces to "look over." Ha! One lady on our street gave raisins-dad just threw those out-Understanding why they weren't going to be eaten. Another gave out Little Debbie Star Crunch-which I have no doubt started a lifelong addiction.
Another little lady (mom and dad bought the desk I still use today from her) gave little toys...little puzzles, etc. you wanted to go to her house first because along with the toy she gave full size Hershey bars.
I remember the times I took Tori and Sam out. Painting faces, holding pumpkins when they grew tired. I cherish those times with my little princess and Power Ranger.